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Our hotel room was robbed one evening while we were
at dinner. I think I know who did it because
on our way down to the restaurant we saw a
suspicious-looking man loitering in the hallway near
our room. I had a good look at him while we
waited for the elevator, and when we returned to our
room and found our belongings had been removed, I
could picture his face perfectly.
The man took my clothes and a fur coat I bought
Bobbie when we were in the Netherlands. He
also took jewelry that had been in Bobbie's family
for years and was precious to us--because of its
family history. We reported the theft and gave
the police a detailed description of the
burglar. Bobbie and I talked about the loss
for a while and then went to bed. The next
morning, when I tried to do my meditation, I was
disturbed by the picture of the man in the hallway
and by thoughts of what I would like to do to
him. The same thing happened the next morning,
and every morning thereafter. Even after we'd
checked out of the hotel and returned home, the
man's face followed me, and angry thoughts disturbed
my morning meditations.
When several weeks had passed and I was still angry
over our loss and violation, I realized the burglar
was in charge of my thoughts and my life. That
morning I decided to reclaim my life and
thoughts. I spontaneously visualized the man
bringing his children Christmas presents that he
purchased with the money he obtained when he sold
our possessions.
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As I pictured the
scene, I thought to myself, "If I had known what he was
going to do, I would have left a few dollars on the bedside
table for him so he could bring his children some really lovely
gifts." I finished the visualization smiling, and
never again did the man in the hallway trouble my
thoughts. Now and then I smile thinking of him and his
children.
You can point out that the burglar probably spent the money on
drugs rather than his children. Maybe he did. It
makes no difference to me what he did with our belongings.
I am free because of the change in me. I helped our son
Jeff do the same thing when his home was robbed, only this time
the robber bought his mother a birthday present. Now Jeff
laughs about the incident and my irrational thinking. But
it works.
I was listening on the car radio to Carly Simon singing, "I
Haven't Got Time for the Pain." There is wisdom in
that song. Our time here is limited. We don't have
the luxury of extra time to spend in pain. Some pain may
be necessary--for instance, the pain that protects you from an
injury or leads you to respond to the needs of others. But
the pain you feel when something or someone is disturbing your
life and thoughts is not useful, and you will be happier when
you resolve the problem and reclaim your life.
The burglar taught me that events are not my problem. My
thoughts about the events are the problem. This is
fortunate, because I can't change the things that have happened
but I can change my thoughts about them.
What thoughts are so important that it is worth holding on to
them even when they make you miserable? Why are you
holding on? You are in charge of your thoughts and
feelings. If you are willing to search for the reason that
you can't let go of disturbing thoughts, you can learn about
yourself and restore your own peace of mind.
If something controls you in a way that puzzles you, think of it
as a mystery. Mysteries are best approached by closing
your eyes and mouth to experience darkness and silence. I
find new and healing images in that dark, silent place away from
emotions that control me. Do not be afraid to close your
eyes and be silent in prayer, meditation, rest or sleep.
In those states you may rediscover a new self. Then your
life, time and thoughts will become yours again and you can live
your unique myth.
You are in charge of your visions, images and feelings, and
you can transform the ones that disturb you. What haunts
you like the man in the hallway haunted me? What thoughts
control you and cause you to suffer? It could be thoughts
about something someone did to you, or you may be distress about
something someone did to someone else. You could be
feeling guilt over something you did. Think about the
event and your reaction to it. See if you can find a
solution and let go of the painful thoughts, resolve the problem
and regain peace of mind. If you are puzzled, close your
eyes. Go to a dark and silent place, away from the
emotions, light a candle and see what healing images you find or
what words you hear to solve your puzzle.
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The biggest quality in
successful people I think is an impatience with negative thinking. . . .
How many opportunities come along? If you wait for the right one,
that's wrong,
because it may never be right, and what have you got to
lose? Even if it's a disaster,
you've tried, you've learned
something, you've had an adventure.
And that doesn't mean you can't
do it again.
Edward McCabe |
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Imagine your mind as a garden and
thoughts as the seeds you plant. Habitual negative,
unhealthy, self-critical thoughts produce the weeds and thistles of
depression, discontent,
and anxiety in the garden of your mind. Luckily, the opposite is
also true.
Consistently planting positive, healthy, constructive thoughts will yield
a crop
of beautiful feelings, such as gratitude, love, and joy.
Sue
Patton Thoele |
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