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Humor--Just for Fun!!!

  
Humor is a huge part of living a full life, and there's nothing like a good laugh every now and then.
We present these pages with no plan in mind--no structure or organization,
no categorization--just fun stuff that we think you'll like.
   

  

page 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10

 
An elementary school class goes on a field trip to the police station.
 
The officer points to the 10 MOST WANTED list and tells them that these are the most wanted fugitives in the USA.
 
A little boy says " He is the MOST WANTED in the USA?!"  The officer says "yes."
 
The little boy asks "Why didn't you keep him when you took his picture?"
 

How many Psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one, but the bulb has got to really WANT to change.

  

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This is a story about Little Leroy.

Little Leroy came into the kitchen where his mother was making dinner.  His
birthday was coming up and he thought this was a good time to tell his mother
what he wanted.  "Mom, I want a bike for my birthday."

Little Leroy was a bit of a trouble maker.  He had gotten into trouble at
school and at home.  Leroy's mother asked him if he thought he deserved to
get a bike for his birthday.  Little Leroy, of course, thought he did.

Leroy's mother, being a Christian woman, wanted Leroy to reflect on his
behavior over the last year.  "Go to your room, Leroy, and think about how
you have behaved this year. Then write a letter to God and tell him why you
deserve a bike for your birthday."

Little Leroy stomped up the steps to his room and sat down to write God a
letter.

Letter 1
Dear God,
I have been a very good boy this year and I would like a bike for my
birthday.  I want a red one.
Your friend, Leroy

Leroy knew that this wasn't true.  He had not been a very good boy this year,
so he tore up the letter and started over.

Letter 2
Dear God,
This is your friend Leroy.  I have been a good boy this year and I would like
a red bike for my birthday.  Thank you. Your friend,  Leroy

Leroy knew that this wasn't true either.  So he tore up the letter and
started again.

Letter 3
Dear God,
I have been an "OK" boy this year.  I still would really like a bike for my
birthday. Leroy

Leroy knew he could not send this letter to God either. So, Leroy wrote a
fourth letter.

Letter 4
God,
I know I haven't been a good boy this year.  I am very sorry.  I will be a
good boy if you just send me a bike for my birthday. PLEASE!!! Thank you,  Leroy

Leroy knew, even if it were true, this letter was not going to get him a
bike.  Now, Leroy was very upset.  He went downstairs and told his mom that
he wanted to go to church.  Leroy's mother thought her plan had worked as
Leroy looked very sad.  "Just be home in time for dinner," Leroy's mother
told him. Leroy walked down the street to the church on the corner. Little
Leroy went into the church and up to the alter.  He looked around to see if
anyone was there.  Leroy bent down and picked up a statue of the Virgin Mary.
 He slipped it under his shirt and ran out of the church, down the street,
into the house, and up to his room.  He shut the door to his room and sat
down with a piece of paper and a pen.  Leroy began to write his letter to God.

Letter 5
God,
I'VE GOT YOUR MAMA.  IF YOU WANT TO SEE HER AGAIN, SEND THE BIKE!
Signed, YOU KNOW WHO
  
 
A young boy had just got his driver's permit and inquired of his father, an
evangelist, if they could discuss the use of the car.  His father took him to
the study and said to the boy, "I'll make a deal with you son.  You bring
your grades up from a C to a B-average, study your Bible a little, and get
your hair cut and we'll talk about the car."

Well, the boy thought about that for a moment and decided that he'd best
settle for the offer, and they agreed.  After about six weeks the boy came
back and again asked his father about the car.  Again they went to the study
where his father said, "Son, I've been real proud of you.  You've brought
your grades up, and I've observed that you've been studying your Bible and
participating a lot more in the Bible study class on Sunday mornings.  But
I'm real disappointed seeing as you haven't got your hair cut."

The young man paused a moment and then said, "You know Dad, I've been
thinking about that, and I've noticed in my studies of the Bible that Samson
had long hair, Moses had long hair, John the Baptist had long hair, and
there's even strong argument that Jesus Himself had long hair."

To which his father replied, "You're right son.  Did you also notice that
they all WALKED everywhere they went?"
   

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The patient's family gathered to hear what the specialists had to say.
"Things don't look good. The only chance is a brain transplant.
This is an experimental procedure.  It might work, but the bad news is that
brains are very expensive, and you will have to pay the costs yourselves."
"Well, how much does a brain cost?" asked the relatives.
"For a male brain, $500,000.  For a female brain, $200,000." 
Some of the younger male relatives tried to look shocked, but all the men
nodded because they thought they understood.  A few actually smirked.
But the patient's daughter was unsatisfied and asked, "Why the difference in
price between male brains and female brains?"
"A standard pricing practice," said the head of the team.
"Women's brains have to be marked down because they have actually been used."

 

 

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