What we don't let out traps us. We think, no one else feels this
way, I must be crazy. So we don't say anything.
become enveloped by a deep loneliness, not knowing where
our feelings come from or what to do with them. Why do I
feel this way? Last week, I was on top of the world and
now my feelings don't make sense. Voicing it, getting it
out and letting other people hear it, helps to dissipate
it. The fears and self-criticisms begin to leak.
begin to heal.
Sabrina Ward Harrison
it's difficult to recognize that some of our
"negative" or hurtful feelings come from our
attempts to repress other feelings. When we don't
feel that our feelings are appropriate or we don't want to
share them because we're afraid of how other people may
react to them, we keep them buried within us. If
they stay inside us, they can fester and grow a life of
their own, adding a new dimension to the original negative
feelings. Now not only do I feel a great sense of
indignation about something, but I've added to it the
frustration of not being able to voice my feelings.
my experience, some other people are uncomfortable hearing
other people's problems, so it can make us even more
unlikely to share ours. Others can even attach
labels like "complainer" or "whiner"
to us when we're simply trying to voice our concerns or
frustrations, making it even more difficult for us to
share the next time. All these labels mean, though,
is that these people aren't willing or able to allow
someone else to share their feelings. When we
discover this, it's important that we find another, more
find that I don't always need another person around in
order to be able to voice my feelings. My prayers
often center on such feelings, and as I voice my concerns
I clarify them and understand them more (I like to pray
aloud while taking walks in nice places). Often I'll
write them down in order to take advantage of the benefits
of the act of writing, which helps me to clarify them even
very little benefit to keeping feelings locked inside like
prisoners, especially since they don't really deserve to
be treated like prisoners. Our feelings are just as
much a part of us as everything else, and it's impossible
to let them grow and develop if they never see the light
of day. Voice them, share them, clarify them.
Then they can grow into beautiful new parts of ourselves
that we can love and cherish like all the other parts of