It's important to remember that what we keep in our
minds does affect us, and it tends to affect us very
strongly. One who holds on to jealousy suffers
needlessly, as does one who holds on to resentment.
When we do keep thoughts of resentment and anger in our
minds, it usually doesn't have any effect at all on the
person of whom we're resentful, even though we like to
fool ourselves into thinking that our negative feelings
are, indeed, having an effect.
Resentment hurts me if I'm resentful. It hurts me
because it keeps me focused on negative things like anger
and bad experiences, and it doesn't allow me to stay fully
present in the now. Resentment is a result of the
ego having its say--it's been bruised, so therefore it's
going to take charge and make sure that we keep our minds
on that bruised ego. It truly doesn't do us any good
at all, but it is a very real phenomenon that holds many
people hostage to negative feelings that never go away
until one learns how to let go of the resentment and move
on with their lives.
As Susan says, we all have had to deal with hurtful
experiences. Usually, we're able to move on and
leave them behind without keeping our minds on the
negative things that others might or might not have
done. When we're not, though, we hold ourselves
hostage to our own ego, which makes the demand,
The only way to move on and move up is to honestly let go
of the resentment, to acknowledge our hurt and our pain
and let it take its place in our past, where it
belongs. Because as long as we keep it alive and
allow it to interfere with our present, we'll continue to
give others power over us by allowing their actions to
affect us long after we should be over it.