January 2

Today's quotation:

We face up to awful things because we can't go around them, or forget them.  The sooner you say 'Yes, it happened, and there's nothing I can do about it,' the sooner you can get on with your own life.  You've got children to bring up.  So you've got to get over it.  What we have to get over, somehow we do.  Even the worst things.

Annie Proulx
The Shipping News

Today's Meditation:

I've so often tried to avoid facing or even thinking about the negative things in life because they scared me terribly.  I believe that I've always been scared that terrible things won't end--that they'll come into my life and stay forever and make me miserable until the day I die.  But I've learned that they really don't do that, and once I started accepting them for exactly what they are, they really don't frighten me any more, and they're much easier to get over rather quickly.

And I agree completely with Annie--we've got to learn to get over things quickly because other people need us.  No, we don't always have to be strong for others, but if we are we're doing them an invaluable service and contributing to the positive side of the world.

But how do we get over them?  Some things are devastating, but it's important to keep in mind that often, they're devastating because we let them be so and because we don't accept them, hoping against hope that if we deny them, they won't affect us as strongly.  That's exactly why acceptance is so important in our efforts to overcome the awful things in life.  If the things have happened, they've happened.  Things are as they are, and denying that fact won't make anything better at all.  There really is nothing to do about something that already has happened, but there's much to do about the recovery from it, as long as we're ready in heart and mind and spirit to actually work towards making things better.

Has someone hurt you?  Accept that it's happened and you can work towards recovery.  Deny that it's happened, or tell yourself that it doesn't matter, and you'll be stuck.  A death of a loved one?  It's happened, and things are as they are now--when you accept the death, you can move through your grief towards recovery.  We're more than willing to accept a broken bone and get a cast put on it, but somehow it's easier not to accept some of the things that happen to us--and when we don't, we put off the healing indefinitely.

We are resilient beings, but our resiliency is dependent upon our ability to accept situations for what they are rather than wishing that they were something that they aren't.

Questions to consider:

What kinds of things make acceptance difficult at times?

Why is it easier for us to wish that things were different than it is for us to accept them as they are?

What kinds of things are most difficult for you to accept?  Where might that difficulty have originated?

For further thought:

Acceptance of what has happened is the first step
to overcoming the consequence of any misfortune.

William James

more on acceptance

  

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