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Today's
Meditation:
We all face defeats, don't we? And the more we
attempt-- the more we put ourselves out there and take
risks and try things that are new and different-- the more
defeats we face. This simple fact, it seems, is what
keeps most people from taking risks. They have a
fear of failure, otherwise known as a fear of
defeat. They want to try things and succeed each
time, for they've tasted defeat, and all they knew how to
do was to give up in the face of defeat, and they didn't
like that feeling.
Sometimes defeats are final. Sometimes the other
person is just bigger or better or much more
talented. But usually, defeats are just life's way
of teaching us what we need to work on, what we need to
improve at, what we need to change if we want to win
victories in the future. If I don't get a job that I
dearly hoped for, I can sit down and figure out how I
might have made myself a stronger candidate and then go
after the next job. If I get fired from a job
because of my performance, I can work at making myself
much better at that job so that next time not only will I
not get fired, but I will excel at the job.
Sometimes this is easy to say. Sometimes defeats are
more signals that we're doing the wrong thing. I
worked in sales a few times when I was younger, and I did
fairly well, but not great. It took me quite a while
to admit to myself that I wasn't a salesperson, and that
it was important for me to pursue other lines of work that
were more suited to who I am. In that case I didn't
so much give up on sales as I found other work that was
more fulfilling to me, and that I was better at.
I've received more rejections from agents and publishers
than I can remember. But that doesn't keep me from
writing as a hobby. No, I won't make a living from
writing at this pace, but I enjoy the lack of pressure
that this type of writing affords me. I've faced
those small defeats and I've found ways to work around
them-- in fact, those defeats are the very impetus that has
helped me to grow as a writer.
If you have a passion, do not give up. When you do,
the final defeat is coming from you, not from outside of
yourself. Then you can't say that such-and-such
keeps you from succeeding-- you can only say that you've
faced a defeat or five, and that you've since given up.
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