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Today's
Meditation:
Some people think that they're able to "hold love
back," and they try to do so to keep from hurting
themselves. They think that by not showing their
love, they can save themselves from hurting when the
person leaves or when something bad happens. Love,
though, cannot be held back. We are creatures of
love, after all, and the lives that we lead are to a great
extent defined by the love that is in us and that we share
with others.
When love is the dominating force in our lives, then there
is no hurt in a person leaving, for we always want the
best for all others and we don't attach our own well-being
to the actions of others. When we live by love, we
understand that other people do what they do because of
who they are and not because of who we are, and therefore
there is no hurting involved. It may be difficult to
conceive of this because of the fact that so few of us are
able and willing to have our lives defined by our love,
and most of us still feel hurt deeply when others do
things that we perceive as hurtful to us.
I have known older people who are like ducks when it comes
to hurt-- when the hurtful things come, they simply roll
off the backs of these people, falling harmlessly to the
ground, as rain does on the back of ducks. Some
things that would have devastated me have had no real
harmful effect on these people-- they've certainly
expressed their compassion for the people who would have
harmed them, but they weren't hurt themselves. They
really did live from a place of love, not of neediness or
control or fear.
Can we get rid of our fear and admit that we love
everyone? Can we show that love appropriately, all
day every day? If we can, then we'll find that our
lives are transformed from being one scary situation after
another, with some good stuff thrown in, to being a long
series of positive situations in which we learn about
others and about ourselves, about how to give and about
how to feel true compassion no matter what happens.
A lofty goal? Castles in the air? Perhaps, but
the most important possibility we must consider:
perhaps not.
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Questions to
consider:
Why do we feel that if we hold our love back, we'll have
less chance of getting hurt? Does that make sense,
or is it just a defective defensive strategy?
How can there continue to be more love if we love all we
can?
What does it mean to you to be hurt? Is that the
same meaning that everyone would give the concept? |
