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Today's
Meditation:
I see this
trait in many of my high-school students. They're
unable to function on their own without someone else
telling them what to do-- and often, that someone else is
the phone that they're unable to put down. I think
that I would add to Cheryl's first sentence "to stay
in line or depend on their phones," because
the electronic age has taught parents a new way to control
the behavior of their kids-- give them screens to watch,
and they'll be occupied and they won't bother us.
Unfortunately, though, they're still not learning the life
skills that they need to deal with life later.
We do
need kids to "stay in line" in certain
situations, especially when they're part of groups such as
classes. But kids also should be able to live the
freedom that is inherent in being a young human
being. They should be free to explore, to challenge,
to experiment, to make mistakes-- even huge ones. A
child who isn't making mistakes and learning from them is
going to grow into an adult who may or may not be able to
deal with the realities that he or she is facing because
he or she has not learned the skills of problem resolution
or simple coping strategies.
What
does it mean to lead our own lives rather than
being followers? It means that we make our own
decisions without consulting with someone else; it means
we forge our own path without looking for validation from
someone else; it means that we determine our own ideals
and principles and ethics without adopting someone
else's. It means that we love and respect ourselves
enough to trust ourselves to take steps that we believe
in, without having to consult with anyone else about
whether or not they're the right steps to take.
We do
a lot of damage to our children when we turn them into
followers who aren't learning how to lead themselves
through life. It's not up to us to "keep them
in line"; rather, it's up to us to provide them with
an environment in which they'll find the safety necessary
for them to lead their own lives and feel secure enough to
take risks now, when they're young, that won't have such
drastic consequences as some of the risks that they'll
take later. Let's help our children to grow up to be
able to deal with what life has in store for them, and not
try to keep them in line for our own comfort or
convenience.
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