In my garden
it is clear that a little support goes a long way. The many
times that I have been there for a baby's first steps provide a
great example for me. As a child threatens to take his first
steps, my instinct is to grab hold of him and make sure he doesn't
fall. But when I just offer him my two fingers to latch on to,
he proudly moves forward on his own and soon is able to provide his
own support.
I've been
fortunate enough to have friends who have done similar things for
me. When I was starting out on my own, developing a marketing
consulting business, I was terrified. I felt just like my plum
tomatoes. In disarray, I slithered aimlessly about in a
thousand different directions, knowing that I had the talent to make
it, but unable to pull it together to grow upward. And then my
closest friends came along and propped me up. My dear friend
Michael gave me the most exciting and fruitful client lead that I
could have hoped for. My New York friend Patty sent a dozen
client leads my way. My guardian angel of a brother, Gordon,
coached me relentlessly on negotiating the best deal for
myself. And Bija (Whose name in Sanskrit means
"seed") fed me determinedly with confidence and optimism.
What I was
most grateful for is that no one came along and told me how to do
it--how to run my own business, how to follow up with clients, how
to create an accounting system. They all knew that I had it in
me.
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They knew that striking out on my own was the next
metamorphosis for me. It was as though long ago, they had
peered behind my budding flower to see the minute shape of an
entrepreneur ready to burst forth if supported properly. They
staked me up, tethered me loosely, and let me grow on my own.
And it's a
lesson I strive to provide to my cherished allies as well.
When those you
love dearly are struggling, don't try to control their
destiny. Just provide them with a little something to lean on,
and if they are meant to flourish, they will do so on their own.
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