self - self-love

In my day, we didn't have
self-esteem, we had self-respect,
and no more of it than we had earned.

Jane Haddam


Don't seek to gain anything for yourself that forces you to break your word or lose self-respect; to hate, suspect, or curse another; or to be insincere or to desire something that needs to remain secret.
   Look to the people whose main desire is to nurture their minds and their inner spirits.  They do not fuss, complain, or crave either solitude or a crowd.  And, most important of all, they will live without either striving or avoiding, and will not care whether their lives are long or short.
   If death comes for them at this very instant, they will go as easily as if they were doing any other act needing self-respect and calm, being careful of only this through their lives:  that their thoughts do not stray into paths incompatible with an intelligent and social being.

Marcus Aurelius

It is the highest form of self-respect to admit our errors and mistakes and make amends for them. To make a mistake is only an error in judgment, but to adhere to it when it is discovered shows infirmity of character.

Dale E. Turner

Self-respect cannot be hunted. It cannot be purchased.  It is never for sale. It cannot be fabricated out of public relations.  It comes to us when we are alone, in quiet moments, in quiet places, when we suddenly realize that, knowing the good, we have done it; knowing the beautiful, we have served it; knowing the truth, we have spoken it.

Whitney Griswold

Those that respect themselves are safe from others; They wear a coat of mail that none can pierce.

Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

To free us from the expectations of others, to give us back to
ourselves--there lies the great, singular power of self-respect.

Joan Didion


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That you may retain your self-respect, it is better
to displease the people by doing what you know is right,
than to temporarily please them by doing what you know is wrong.

William J.H. Boetcker


The capacity for getting along with our neighbor
depends to a large extent on the capacity for getting
along with ourselves.  The self-respecting individuals
will try to be as tolerant of their neighbor's
shortcomings as they are of their own.

Eric Hoffer


If I despised myself, it would be no compensation if everyone
saluted me, and if I respect myself, it does not trouble me
if others hold me lightly.

Max Nordau


Self-respect is the cornerstone of all virtue.

John Herschel


Never esteem anything as of advantage to you that
will make you break your word or lose your self-respect.

Henry Brooks Adams


My mother insisted that everyone in her life treat her with respect.  Though
she wasn't wealthy or well educated, my mother not only understood
and appreciated her value, but believed in it.  Strongly.  Deeply.
Passionately. . . . when she learned he was cheating on her, she insisted
that he move out of our home.  Not the next day or the next week.  The very
day Chubby discovered my father had gone back on his promise to be faithful
to her, she told him he had to go. . . . To me, as a child, Chubby's refusal
to take my father back seemed harsh, even cruel.  As a woman, however,
I have come to understand it.  For my mother, putting Daddy out of the
house and her life wasn't about pride; it was about principle.  The one
she had always lived by.  The one she believed in with all her heart:  No one
was going to love and respect you unless you loved and respected yourself.

Patti LaBelle

self - self-love


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Respect yourself and others will respect you.


Some people have so much respect for their superiors they have none left for themselves.

Peter McArthur

Self-respect permeates every aspect of your life.

Joe Clark


The principal thing children are taught
by hearing these lullabies is respect.
They are taught to respect certain
things in life and certain people.
By giving respect, they hope to
gain self-respect and through
self-respect, they gain the respect
of others.  Self-respect is one of
the qualities my people stress and
try to nurture, and one of the
controls an Indian has as he or
she grows up.  Once you lose
your self-respect, you just go down.

Henry Old Coyote



The tragedy is that so many people look for self-confidence
and self-respect everywhere except within themselves,
and so they fail in their search.

Nathaniel Branden


True humility is intelligent self-respect which keeps us from thinking
too highly or too meanly of ourselves.  It makes us modest by
reminding us how far we have come short of what we can be.

Ralph W. Sockman


Would that there were an award for people who come to understand
the concept of enough.  Good enough.  Successful enough.  Thin
enough.  Rich enough.  Socially responsible enough.  When
you have self-respect, you have enough.

Gail Sheehy


Coming to appreciate your worth can, in some cases, dramatically improve
your circumstances by changing the choices you make and the actions
you take.  And as you begin to treat yourself with more respect, other
people begin to do the same, since we subconsciously "train" others how
to treat us through messages we send through body language, tone of
voice, and other subtle cues and behaviors.  Discovering your innate
worth and living from that place allows you to make more
constructive choices--to choose the higher roads of life.

Dan Millman



self - self-love   

"Simon, let me be sure if I comprehend what you're saying.
Your position is that man, at one time, perhaps through a closer communion
with his God, believed that he was truly a marvelous creation, a superior
being made in the image of God.  Then he began to make discoveries that
gradually chipped away at the high opinion he had of himself, until he eventually
was thinking, 'If we're not godlike people, if we do not live in the center of
God's world, if we are really only animals, and if we cannot control and explain
many of our actions, then we are not of any more consequence than the weeds
in our garden.  If we are not, in truth, very much of anything, then how can we
be proud of ourselves?  And if we are not proud of what we are, how can we
like ourselves?  And if we don't like ourselves, who wants to live with that
sort of person. . . so. . . let's get rid of ourselves.  Let's drive too fast, or drink
too much, or eat too much, or purposely foul up so that we can get ourselves
fired from our jobs so that we can sit in the corner and suck our thumbs and tell
ourselves that we're worthless anyway, so what the hell.'  Is that it?"


Og Mandino
The Greatest Miracle in the World

If you want to be respected, you must respect yourself.

Spanish Proverb


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People do not live by bread alone.  Many prefer self-respect to food.

Mohandas Gandhi

You almost have to step outside yourself and look at you as if you
were someone else you really care about and really want to protect.
Would you let someone take advantage of that person?  Would you
let someone use that person you really care about?  Or would you
speak up for them?  If it was someone else you care about, you'd
say something.  I know you would.  Okay, now put yourself back in
that body.  That person is you.  Stand up and tell 'em, "Enough!”

Queen Latifah
Put on Your Crown


I have found that the way to deal with disrespectful individuals is to let them know
that I am not a person who is going to tolerate that kind of conduct.  So if a clerk
reacts to me rudely, the first thing I do is say to myself, This is their behavior.  They
own this.
  Then I try to react with some kind of kindness.  If that doesn’t work, I
immediately go to another employee or to a supervisor, or I leave the situation
altogether.  I will not stand there and be physically, mentally, intellectually, or
spiritually abused by anyone, ever, because I know that in allowing this to happen,
I have given that person permission to treat me that way.

Wayne Dyer
Happiness Is the Way



Yes, life can be mysterious and confusing--but there's much of life that's actually rather dependable and reliable.  Some principles apply to life in so many different contexts that they can truly be called universal--and learning what they are and how to approach them and use them can teach us some of the most important lessons that we've ever learned.
My doctorate is in Teaching and Learning.  I use it a lot when I teach at school, but I also do my best to apply what I've learned to the life I'm living, and to observe how others live their lives.  What makes them happy or unhappy, stressed or peaceful, selfish or generous, compassionate or arrogant?  In this book, I've done my best to pass on to you what I've learned from people in my life, writers whose works I've read, and stories that I've heard.  Perhaps these principles can be a positive part of your life, too!
Universal Principles of Living Life Fully.  Awareness of these principles can explain a lot and take much of the frustration out of the lives we lead.



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