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I was
recently looking to buy a new printer, and I went to Office
Max to see what kinds of printers they had to offer. I
had a couple of questions about their wireless capabilities,
so when one of the guys who worked there came over and asked
if I needed help, I said yes and asked him a question.
I was
about halfway through the question when he asked "Which
operating system are you using?"
I was
a bit taken aback that he had interrupted the question
before I had even finished it, and a bit perplexed that he
was asking a question that had nothing to do with my
question. It wasn't until I looked back up at him that
I realized that he was talking on the phone with someone
through the Bluetooth unit perched so prominently on his
ear.
He
had asked me if I needed help, while he was supposedly
"helping" someone else on the phone. It was
ridiculous, and I told him that I was fine and that I'd
figure out my questions on my own. He looked at me a
bit surprised, and asked, "Are you sure?" I
said yes--after all, what good can he do me when he's not
even focused on what he's doing?
I'm
constantly amazed at the number of people I see spending
"quality" time with their kids, only to pull out
the cell phone and have a long and involved conversation
with someone who isn't even there.
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The poor kid is
relegated to the status of ignored companion, unless they do
something they shouldn't do, when the adult will take two
seconds from the conversation to say "Knock that
off!"
It
makes me wonder if today's little kids will have to become
even more destructive and anti-social in order to gain the
attention that they crave.
In
spite of the reams of evidence that cell phone use while
driving is incredibly dangerous (at least 2600 people DIE
every year because of it), many, many people still insist
upon carrying on phone conversations while behind the wheel
in traffic. (See http://www.drivinglaws.org/stats.php
and http://www.drivinglaws.org/top10/10-reasons.php.)
Tens of thousands of people have lost their husbands, wives,
sons, daughters, mothers, fathers. . . . you name it, only
because someone thought "It'll never happen to
me." Those people were wrong, and they've killed
other people because they weren't willing to give their
undivided attention to the task at hand, which was driving.
Why
are we so unwilling--and almost unable--to give our
undivided attention to the tasks that we do? All
throughout our culture and society, we see declines in the
quality of work and the service, and much of this is due to
the fact that people seem to think that multi-tasking isn't
just a new norm, but a necessity.
In
the United States, at least, we used to have a very strong
work ethic, and we used to teach our kids to be proud of the
results of their work. We much more often focused on
outcomes, and because we wanted it to be positive, we
learned to put our undivided attention to the task we had
taken on. When a parent spent time with a child, they
spent time together, talking or playing or just going for a
long walk. Nowadays, though, parents seem to resent
this distraction that keeps them from watching their TV and
spending time on the phone talking about trifles. So
they compromise by being there physically with the
kid, but certainly not there emotionally or mentally for
the kid.
In
the classroom, in spite of all the people who glorify the
idea of multi-tasking, I find that the students who are able
to sit down and focus on the assignment are the ones who
succeed in learning the material. Because of that, I
spend a lot of time in class teaching kids how to focus, and
believe it or not, these kids appreciate that. Over
and over again, these teenagers thank me for helping them to
learn how to study, because no one else ever had tried to do
so. Most teachers are so intent on the assignments
that they never pay attention to whether or not their
students are even able to focus on the material they're
supposed to be learning.
And
with the role models that these young people have, is it any
surprise that they have a hard time focusing? Whom
have they seen who models the ability to put their undivided
attention on a task? Even many pro athletes don't
focus on their sports exclusively any more--during games,
watch how many NFL players are just as interested in the
crowd and the cameras as they are in the game. And
those are the ones that the networks give the most camera
time to. . . .
I
know many people who are almost never satisfied with the
results that they get in life, whether that be at work, with
their hobbies, in their relationships, or in other
areas. Most of these people don't get the results they
desire because while they're doing something, they're also
focused on something else. Is a conversation with your
wife as valuable when you're also watching a TV show?
Is time spent with your teenager going to be as valuable if
you--or her--spend most of your time on the phone with
someone else? Can you really get your work done well
if you're also surfing the Internet? These are
questions that most of us never seem to address--and
probably because we already know the answer, and we just
don't really want to hear it.
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