It's
Monday once more, and our new week is moving on, as
time tends to do.
We hope that you're making the most of the time that
you're living through by
paying attention to the beautiful and positive
things in your life!
Individuality is either the mark of genius or the
reverse. Mediocrity finds safety in standardization.
-
Frederick E. Crane
Some things can only be
understood when you're in a tree house. With a pile of warm chocolate chip cookies. And a book.
-
Dr. SunWolf
To
pursue joy is to lose it. The only way to get it is
to
follow steadily the path of duty, without thinking of joy,
and
then, like sheep, it comes most surely, unsought.
-
Alexander
Maclaren
Cease
trying to work everything out with your minds. It will get
you nowhere. Live by intuition and inspiration and let your
whole life be
Revelation. -
Eileen
Caddy
Wrote
the poet and mystic Maeterlinck: "The thoughts
you think will irradiate you as though you are a
transparent vase." We radiate what we are
and so it is more important to be than to get,
to become than to possess. People tune
in to our inner wave length. There is much wisdom in
the old Hindu saying: "Beware, beware, what
goes forth from you will come back to you."
As
a boy I learned a little rhyme that I have never
forgotten: "Don't be a veneer stuck on with
glue, be solid mahogany all the way through."
Our
first task then, in living with ourselves, is to be
ourselves, to be genuine and sincere, to go forth to
others as the persons we truly are without sham or
pretense. Beyond this our task is to grow in mind
and spirit.
While
driving on the Ohio Turnpike I saw a sign exhorting
drivers. "Stay Awake, Stay Alive,"
it cried. These words, it seems to me, have even
deeper significance as a way of life. The more awake
we are to what goes on around us the more alive we will
be. Being wide awake opens the way to experiencing
the infinite riches of body, mind, heart and spirit.
We
do not sufficiently use the senses God has given us.
The magazine ETC, the quarterly review of the
International Society of General Semantics, devoted a full
issue to the subject of LSD and other psychedelic drugs.
Editor
S.I. Hayakawa made this vital point: "Most
people haven't learned to use the senses they
possess. I not only hear music, I listen to
it. I find the colors of the day such vivid
experiences that I sometimes pound the steering wheel with
excitement. And I say why disorient your beautiful
senses with drugs and poisons before you have half
discovered what they can do for you?"
The
great mystics did not fog up the windows of heaven with
drugs. They did not distort their visions with
poisons. They found their own senses and their
perceptive ad intuitive powers sufficient to experience
the Presence of God.
To
make the most of ourselves we must become aware of the
miracles all around us. We must open our eyes, ears,
minds, hearts, spirits. We must think about great
ideas such as space illimitable, time everlasting, energy
inexhaustible. You have the magic power within
yourself to broaden your horizons, to lift your
consciousness, to live more abundantly.
To
learn to live with ourselves we must often get away by
ourselves so we can find quiet, solitude, and time to
think and meditate.
The
poet Robert Frost stressed the importance of
separateness. He told a group, of which I was a
part, that we must be careful that we do not homogenize
society as we homogenize milk. . . so the cream at the top
disappears. The heart and the lungs work together,
he explained, but they are also separate organs. A
person, he said, should endeavor to achieve separateness
in his or her thinking, even amidst the pressures of the
crowd. And often we may experience a greater feeling
of togetherness with people when we are separate and
alone, rather than with others. We must learn to
live together, but we must not lose the precious gift of
separateness.
The
growth of the self, however, is not accomplished only in
solitude and isolation. Aloneness must be balanced
with contacts with people and the world. There is
need to try out our ideas on others, to sharpen our minds,
to contend with those who disagree with us. We can
learn from our enemies as well as our friends, and often
those who are hardest on us contribute more to our growth
than those who make things easy for us.
I
have always liked these words attributed to Walt
Whitman: "Have you learned lessons only of
those who admired you and were tender with you and stood
aside for you? Have you not learned great lessons
from those who braced themselves against you, and disputed
the passage with you?"
The
self needs the spur of conflict, competition, even defeat,
for out of those come strength and character.
Heed
these words by Epictetus: "So when the crisis
is upon you, remember that God, like a trainer of
wrestlers, has matched you with a tough and stalwart
antagonist--that you may be a winner at the Great
Games."
The
art of living with ourselves also requires that we be
resilient and flexible so we will not break ourselves
against the hardness of life. I learned this
important lesson from a naturalist in Bryce Canyon,
Utah. I asked him about the gallant lone pines on
the mountaintops that survive the full sweep of wind and
storm.
I
was told that the pines are called Limber Pines. To
demonstrate, the naturalist took a branch of a Limber Pine
and tied it into a knot. In a few minutes he untied
the knot and the branch immediately sprang back to its
original position.
It
is not through never bending that the trees survive.
It is in never failing to spring erect again after the
gale has passed that victory is achieved.
Resiliency
is also an important factor in the art of living with
ourselves. The winds of life--the conflicts,
pressures, changes--will bend us, but if we have
resiliency of the spirit they cannot break us. To
courageously straighten up again after our heads have been
bowed by defeat, disappointment and suffering is a supreme
test of character.
To
learn to live with ourselves, to make the most of
ourselves, to achieve wholeness of personality, to grow
into more effective human beings--this is the first vital
step in the art of living.
We
have some
inspiring and motivational books that may interest you. Our main way of supporting this site is
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online reader). All of the money that we earn
through them comes back to the site
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non-fiction!
Gracious giving requires no special talent, nor large amounts of
money. It is compounded of the heart and head acting
together to achieve the perfect means of expressing our
feelings. It is love sharpened with imagination. For,
as Emerson explains, "The only gift is a portion of
thyself."
A little girl gave her mother several small boxes tied with bright
ribbons. Inside each were slips of paper on which the child
had printed messages such as, "Good for two flower-bed
weedings," "Good for two floor-scrubbings."
She had never read Emerson, but unconsciously she put a large part
of her small self into her gift.
When unexpected expenses wrecked a business girl's budget at
Christmas, she hit upon a similar happy idea. Her presents
that year were "time credit" slips which her friends
could cash in at their convenience. A young couple received
slips entitling them to leave the baby with her for two
week-ends. To a niece in college went an offer of her car for
a Christmas vacation trip. An elderly shut-in could claim
her time for five reading-aloud sessions. No costly presents
gave so much satisfaction--both ways.
A young bride received a wedding present from an older
woman. With it went a note, "Do not open until you and
your husband have your first tiff." When there finally
came a day of misunderstanding the bride remembered the
package. In it she found a card box filled with her friend's
favorite recipes--and a note, "You will catch more flies with
honey than you will with vinegar." It was a wise woman
indeed who gave of her experience with her gift.
Often the most successful gift is a spontaneous one. Act
while the impulse is fresh--giving of yourself knows no special
days.
Probably no gift ever thrilled a doctor more than a letter he
received from a youngster on her birthday. "Dear
Doctor, 14 years ago you brought me into this world. I want
to thank you, for I have enjoyed every minute of it."
Family gifts should be the most satisfying because we know each
member's wish and whim. Yet how often we make the
stereotyped offerings--ties, candy, or household utensils.
One man I know is planning an unusual present for his wife.
When I saw him coming out of a dancing studio, he explained:
"I got tired of hearing my wife complain about my
dancing. It's going to be a lasting birthday present for
her--my dancing well."
An elderly lady on an Iowa farm wept with delight when her son in
New York had a telephone installed in her house and followed it up
with a weekly long-distance call.
Flowers are our first thought for a sick friend. But why not
a more imaginative idea? A friend in a hospital received a
flowerpot filled with dirt. On top was a packet of seeds
with the note, "You'll have more fun growing your
own!" A nurse told me about a woman patient whose
recovery dated from the moment a neighbor brought her a pressure
cooker, something she had always wanted.
In her autobiography, His Eye Is on the Sparrow, Ethel
Waters tells about her gift to Rex Stout when he was
convalescing. Though she was starring at the time in a
Broadway play, she turned up early one morning at the hospital
and, dressed as a nurse, carried in his breakfast tray. She
spent the day with Stout, diverting him with chitchat, wheeling
his chair, giving him all her attention. Friends of the
author said that this was his most cherished gift.
In your own profession or business you have imaginative gift
opportunities. One Christmas morning a Washington, D.C.,
woman was waiting for a trolley to go to the station when a taxi
stopped beside her. The driver motioned her to get in.
At the station when she fumbled in her purse for the fare, the
driver said, "Nothing doing--I asked you. Merry
Christmas." In memory of her sister who was killed in
service during the war, a waitress often pays the checks of
servicemen who sit at her table.
All gifts that contain a portion of self signify that someone has
been really thinking of us. One of the most useful and
thoughtful travel presents a girl ever received was currency of
the country to which she was going. A friend bought her some
pesos from a bank so that she would have the correct money for
tips and taxi fare when she first arrived in Mexico.
A GI stationed in Mississippi tells this story: "I made
friends with a sharecropper who lived near camp. Though
poor, he was the most contented man I had ever met. One day
when I was grousing about not being able to borrow $20 that I
needed, he handed me the money, saying it was a gift, not a
loan. He explained it this way: 'If I lend you this
money and for some reason you never return it, I must always think
you have wronged me. If I give it to you as a gift, we're
both happy. When you have the money and feel you want to
make me a gift of $20, then we'll both be happy again.'"
Chances for heroic giving are rare, yet every day there are
opportunities to give a part of yourself to someone who needs
it. It may be no more than a kind word or a letter written
at the right time. The important thing about any gift is the
amount of yourself you put into it.
Living
Life Fully, the e-zine
exists to try to provide for visitors of the world wide web a
place
of growth, peace, inspiration, and encouragement. Our
articles
are presented as thoughts of the authors--by no means do
we
mean to present them as ways that anyone has to live
life. Take
from them what you will, and disagree with
whatever you disagree
with--just know that they'll be here for you
each week.
I
believe imagination is our premium resource. We carry
within us the lost diversity this planet needs. Engaging
our individual expression, using imagination to inform,
expand, and guide us, we can begin to return to Eden.
Suzanne Beth Stinnett
Little Shifts
Accomplishing
Nothing
It's really
fascinating to witness one of my more annoying traits--my
inability to do nothing without feeling that I'm wasting
"precious" time. It's a trait that annoys only me,
fortunately, because other people generally don't know what I'm
feeling. Let me explain.
When I have
days off, or even weeks off, I always feel that I should be
accomplishing something. I should be on the computer,
working on revising one of my unpublished novels (there are four),
working on the website, or creating or revising something
else. If I shouldn't be on the computer, then I should be
out in the yard, working, or in the garage, cleaning and
arranging. Or perhaps I should be painting the house or
washing the dishes. My mind somehow thinks that I always
should be accomplishing something "worthwhile," and not
"wasting" time by doing nothing.
When I was
a kid, I used to love to read. I read tons of books, almost
all the time. These days, though, I start to feel guilty
when I spend time sitting around and reading--even though I know
that when I'm reading I'm accomplishing something very important.
Activity and rest are two vital aspects of life.
To find a balance in them
is a skill in itself. Wisdom is knowing when to have rest, when to
have
activity, and how much of each to have. Finding them in each other--
activity in rest and rest in activity--is the ultimate freedom.
Sri Sri Ravi Shankar
Because of
this trait, it's very important for me to monitor myself and to
force myself to take time to relax and be still. Stillness
is one of the most important things of my life, and there are few
things I like better than putting on a CD of soothing sounds and
sitting on the couch and listening. As I said, though, I
really have to force myself to do this; otherwise, I'd listen to
that part of myself that says I'm wasting time by "doing
nothing."
And when I
am doing "nothing," I remind myself that the inactive
times are just as much a part of life as the active ones, and that
I need to accept my inactivity for what it is--for my acceptance
of it can bring me peace of mind and make the time more
valuable. This way, I don't fret about what I
"should" be doing.
These two
contradictory parts of myself are pretty constantly at odds, and
it's a very strange feeling to have. I write about it,
though, because I'm sure that I'm not the only person who goes
through this--I know people who work 60 or 70 hours a week because
they feel they're wasting time if they're not
"accomplishing" something.
Sometimes
the
most
important
thing in a whole
day is
the rest we
take
between two
deep breaths,
or the
turning inwards in
prayer for five
short minutes.
Etty
Hillesum
What they
don't get, though, is the truth that rest and relaxation are key
ingredients to working really well. Many studies have shown
that people who aren't overworked are actually more efficient
workers, and they tend to do their jobs better. The people
who take the time to back off from work and being busy are the
people who are truly taking care of themselves, and allowing
themselves to recharge their energy so that they can work better
when they do get back to the job.
Is it hard
for you to sit back and do nothing? Is it hard to pick up a
book and enjoy a simple story? Is it hard to go for a long
walk without having a destination in mind, or some sort of task to
accomplish while walking? If it is, it's time to listen to
the common-sense side of yourself that tells you that working all
the time isn't healthy or wise, and that there's much more to life
than "accomplishments." Many people have lived
happy, healthy, creative, loving lives without ever having been
promoted to a high position in a company, or without earning tons
of money or buying expensive cars or houses.
Sometimes
the most urgent and vital thing
you can possibly do is
take a complete rest.
Ashleigh
Brilliant
I don't
particularly like the fact that I have to tell myself constantly
that it's okay to do "nothing," and that doing so is
just as much a part of life as doing "something"
is. But I do feel grateful that I'm able to recognize the
trap that my mind has created so that I can avoid making
"busyness" my reality. If I weren't able to slow
down and relax often, I'm sure that I would burn out rather
quickly, and I certainly don't want to do that. What about
you? Are you able to put on some quiet music or nature
sounds and sit on the couch or floor and listen to your own
breathing, without thinking of the tasks that need to be done
right now? When you can reach the point at which you're able
to do so, you'll definitely be on track to have a rich, full life.
In
all things preserve integrity;
and the consciousness of your
own uprightness
will alleviate
the toil of business,
soften the
hardness of ill-success and
disappointments, and
give you
a humble confidence before
God, when the
ingratitude of
people, or the iniquity of the
times may rob
you
of other rewards.
Barbara Paley
When
your self-identity and beliefs merge, differences feel
threatening. You are likely to defend your turf, become
righteous and angry, and possibly shame or abuse other people who
see things differently. When people adopt a belief--be it
about religion, politics, sex roles, or whatever--as the one,
correct belief, their minds get locked up in a rigid box, and
other people with differing beliefs are seen as the enemy.
And what do you do to the enemy? Abuse them, shame them,
hate them, or even kill them. . . .
Listen to
your beliefs, think about how you learned them, and realize that
they are not genetic, nor are they the "only way."
You are free to acquire new perspectives, to absorb new ideas, and
to question everything you were taught to believe. As your
mind opens to exploration and change, you'll feel a new lightness
and more joy.
They
speak foolishly who ascribe their anger or their impatience to such
as offend them or to tribulation. Tribulation does not make people
impatient, but proves that they are impatient. So everyone may
learn from tribulation how his or her heart is constituted.
Martin Luther
Yes, life
can be mysterious and confusing--but there's much of life that's
actually rather dependable and reliable. Some principles apply
to life in so many different contexts that they can truly be called
universal--and learning what they are and how to approach them and use
them can teach us some of the most important lessons that we've ever
learned.
My doctorate is in Teaching and Learning. I use it a lot when I
teach at school, but I also do my best to apply what I've learned to
the life I'm living, and to observe how others live their lives.
What makes them happy or unhappy, stressed or peaceful, selfish or
generous, compassionate or arrogant? In this book, I've done my
best to pass on to you what I've learned from people in my life,
writers whose works I've read, and stories that I've heard.
Perhaps these principles can be a positive part of your life, too! Universal Principles of Living Life Fully. Awareness of
these principles can explain a lot and take much of the frustration
out of the lives we lead.
Explore all of our
quotations pages--these links will take you to the first page of each
topic, and those pages will contain links to any additional pages on
the same topic (there are five pages on adversity, for example).
™
